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Welcome Spiders! Golbo and Spognot Jump in the Tub

RT: Welcome to the Reading Tub, Golbo - I hope that you won’t find spending time in the Tub as frightening as some of your other adventures. Your story is amazing. What was was the more frightful experience for you: trudging across the snow hiding from blackbirds (and other animals) or the vacuum cleaner?

The Spiders: It’s great to be in one piece to talk to you! The most terrifying experience for me was definitely the vacuum cleaner. You can hide from birds and other animals, but these days vacuum cleaners are becoming so advanced that no spider is safe. I don’t know how we made it out of there alive. Unfortunately, my Uncle Snotkrunch wasn’t so lucky.

RT: Speaking of "we," welcome Spognot. I’m glad you’re able to join us today, too. I have to confess, the song you taught Golbo has stuck in my mind! Could you tell us who taught you that song?

The Spiders: Thank you. I’m delighted to be here. Well, I wish I could claim credit for the wonderful song but it’s a traditional one that all spiders learn when they are young.

Actually Golbo has a terrible voice and can only sing a few of the verses, you it is hard to give you a full appreciation for the tune. [He obviously didn’t listen hard enough to his music teacher at school.]

RT: Well, even just that snippet is wonderful. I don't have any spider friends, because I find it hard to find things in common. Based on your adventures, what do you think that people most misunderstand about you that causes them to be so fearful?

The Spiders: I blame those horror films where the spiders are eight foot tall and have fangs. We’re always the bad guys. If only humans took the time to get to know us, they’d see that we are sweet and cuddly creatures.

RT: Golbo, just before your dream of living on the beach came true, you had a terrible fall … ending with a reminder from Spognot that you really did need to lose some weight. It is often hard to change to a healthier lifestyle, how has that journey gone for you?

The Spiders: It's true, I was carrying a few extra pounds, but I wasn’t as overweight as the book describes!

Anyway, the beach lifestyle makes exercising a lot more fun. Every morning, I go surfing on the special coconut husk surfing board I invented. Now I am in the best shape of my life.

RT: The home you created for yourselves in the vacuum cleaner sounds like it was quite nice. Of course you had the advantage of getting new “stuff” delivered to your door all the time. Spognot, how hard was it to create a home on the beach - especially one that could withstand the weather, the birds, and such?

The Spiders: Great question. Funny enough our life in the vacuum cleaner prepared us for life on the beach. You can’t even begin to imagine the crazy things that people leave around and especially what washes up on the shore.

Thanks to the Spanish shipping container that washed up here the other day, I’m all set to redo our living room using colorful Mediterranean themes. It’s an interior designer’s dream come true!

RT: Is there one item from your vacuum cleaner home that you really wish you could have saved and brought with you to your new digs?

The Spiders:
Spognot: I loved the cork armchair I designed. I spent many a relaxing evening in it drinking a pen cap mug of hot tea. Sadly, I’ve been unable to recreate that chair here on the beach.

Golbo: I wish I could have brought my drinking straw telescope. It would have been ideal to check out the waves every morning before going surfing.

RT: Living in a house with no windows seems so dark and dreary. Did it ever feel that way for you?

The Spiders:
Golbo: Never. Thanks to Spognot’s interior decorating, our vacuum cleaner was a lovely place to stay.

Spognot: Why thank you Golbo. Before ending up in the vacuum cleaner, I’d been forced to stay in some houses with terrible interior decoration. I’ve never understood why humans like dark wood furniture. It creates such a depressing and gloomy atmosphere in the home.

RT: After living in a home with no windows, how hard was it for your eyes to adjust to the light of living at the beach? Do you ever get sunburned?

The Spiders: Golbo: At first the sunshine was a shock, but now we love it. When we go out, we roll about among all the discarded, leaking bottles of sunscreen and so never get sunburned.

RT: Everything in your homes - both the vacuum cleaner and at the beach - are items (or pieces of items) that you have re-purposed. Spognot, have you ever come across any items that you just can’t use?

The Spiders: Once a bunch of yellow rubber ducks washed up on the shore. Golbo thinks he can convert anything we find into something we can use, but even he had to give up with those.

RT: How did you keep from sneezing with all the lint and dust that the vacuum cleaner picked up?

The Spiders:
Golbo: That wasn’t a problem for me. Human houses are so dusty anyway that you just get used to it. It’s a pity that people don’t use their vacuum cleaners more effectively to clean up instead of chasing us spiders.

Spognot: I have more of an issue with the sand on this beach. It’s really itchy!

RT: Thank you both for stopping by today. I am glad we had the chance to chat. I'm definitely more confident about talking with spiders ... and I promise to keep my vacuum cleaner away from them!

Read more about Golbo and Spognot in our interview with award-winning authorFaiz Kermani on the Family Bookshelf blog.


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